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I was taught that my holy calling was to open my legs for one and only one and bear him children.

Recently, while telling a friend from church about a disagreement with my husband, she suggested having more sex. In church, being overweight feels like a sin.] And I am not the only one working out the threads of this Gordian knot.She showed me a handout from her pastor on making a happy home. Nearly 20 years after publication, Harris has recently begun distancing himself from the book.He was young after all, and there were others making the same arguments. Maybe it was his youthful status, or his rising star as a pastor, or the hip fedora on the cover of the book.Whatever the formula, the book became the catalyst for the resurgence of courtship and is often cited as the foundational book for purity culture — a movement that uses biblical principles to encourage men and women to stay virgins before marriage.[TV’s ‘Jane the Virgin': Not all leading ladies are sexually adventurous] Many of my friends at the time refused to even kiss before their wedding day, citing Harris’s books.

Since publication, the book has sold over a million copies, which is no small feat, considering that most Christian books only sell a few thousand.On the surface, I am a purity-culture success story: I am a heterosexual woman, a virgin until marriage, now with two small children and a husband I deeply love. [Pope Francis has an unusually positive view of sex] Purity culture taught me that I ought to be passed down from father to husband, more an inheritance than a human.I was taught that men are my cover and my shield, when for the most part they have been the ones causing damage through molestation, rape and abuse.His comments have touched on a wellspring of dissatisfaction with purity culture felt by generations of women and men raised on his words.His almost-apologies and willingness to open a dialogue have inspired articles about the impact of the book and even a hashtag #Kiss Shame Bye, which former adherents to purity culture use when revealing the deep harm caused by the ideology.a book that was in part a warning about the harm that relationships before marriage could cause.