These sort of patterns point to an unfortunate reality: Talking about your sexual health with your parents—especially when it’s the first time—can be difficult, and may even seem risky.A lot of the time though, it’s a risk worth taking.You can always commiserate about period side effects, especially cramps or bloating.
“It doesn’t mean that you’re allowed to have sex,” she said, pointing her finger at me.We stared at each other with teary eyes and angrily contorted faces that were beginning to soften. " I stood very still, thinking she was saying forget-the-whole-thing-it-was-a-bad-idea-you-can't-take-birth-control. You're right, she's kind of a bitch." Funnily enough, that was the moment everything changed for the better.After dating him for a while, I started trying to talk to my mom about my friends’ dating habits as a segue into a conversation about my relationship. "I'll be right back to start the exam." The doctor walked out, closing the door abruptly. "I hate her." "She's right." "No she's not.Each time I’d notice her tense up or get defensive and accusatory, sometimes threatening to bar me from seeing my boyfriend and my friends. She's a bitch." (I don’t call women bitches anymore, but back then I did. I held it during the whole of my first gynecological exam, and squeezed it tightly.Once I got on the pill and learned that my mom had taken it in the past, I’d talk with her about its side effects to establish a non-awkward, relevant conversation stream.
Note: If you're a woman starting a conversation with your mom, menstruation humor can be a great go-to.
I got the sense that my mom believed I was someone I wasn’t—or was in denial about who I was. When she found out I had sex, I could see the reality hit her, and it didn’t feel good. Also, this woman was sort of a bitch.) My mom said nothing as she exited the room so I could undress. After the exam, my mom and I sat and waited for the doctor to come back with her final consult, or as I see it, final insult.
The day after the argument, my mom picked me up right as school let out. When I asked why, she said, “Because I’m not paying to raise your kid.” In the exam room, there were two chairs next to each other against the wall. When the doctor walked in, her expression communicated that she would be reinstating the argument my parents and I had put to rest. A few minutes later, she and the doctor returned, and the exam started. "I'm putting you on birth control pills,” my mom said quietly.
When my mom found out I was having sex (I repeat: “found out”) back in the day, it wasn’t an ideal situation.
For Mother’s Day, I decided to take an informal poll of young women from lots of different backgrounds to find out how of us don’t experience an ideal situation. 3) Their mom stumbled upon a condom, a birth control pill pack, etc.
Here are some tips, which can also be applied to talking with your dad, aunt, other mom, etc.